The Perfect Christmas / Mrs Mindy Holeman

The Perfect Christmas

Mrs Mindy Holeman

Pastor's Wife

Amazing Grace Baptist Church

Wichita, KS

Have you ever been to a family get together and there was that one person that was completely overwhelmed and stressed out? Did you notice that the entire mood revolved around this person? Are you that person? Our spirit is so very important! We have the power to make or break an event or in some cases an entire holiday season.   Christmas time is a time to spend with your loved ones and cherish some memories made. Whether you are cooking, baking, decorating or making out your Christmas cards remember that these times can become a treasured memory or a time of great regret. We can be so focused on the details that we forget the people we are planning for. When I was newly married I was overwhelmed by the holidays and the idea of having everything just right. The matching outfits for the perfect Christmas picture, the decorations, the meal, and the gifts were all carefully orchestrated to prove to the world that Mindy Holeman had it all together. Sometimes this meant spending money we didn’t have, staying up later than I should, and even sacrificing my time with the Lord all in the name of…PRIDE! I know none of you have ever done this so let’s just say for the next few paragraphs I will be speaking to me.

Let’s take a look at some of the effects of what I did in the name of “Jesus is the reason for the season”.

Every December I would shop for the perfect outfits to take our Christmas pictures in so I could show off my perfect little family. In reality, we didn’t always have the money to buy new outfits but I have a patient and loving husband that made sacrifices so he could please his wife. I should have never done that to him in the first place. I added extra stress to him that really could have been avoided if I would have thought of someone other than myself. After that fact, I would feel guilty and it would affect my mood or spirit toward him.

Decorations!! I LOVE TO DECORATE!! I love to decorate so much that no one else is allowed to do it because… they don’t do it right! That’s right. I said it! I’m a perfectionist! I say “I am” because I am still working on this. I am one of those ppl that say “ yes sweetheart, you can put the star on the tree”. And then I spend the next 20 mins fixing it so it is “just right”. “yes you can help me decorate the tree”…(just make sure that you do it just like me!!) If I keep that up, one day, my girls will stop asking if they can help and I will be alone and sad because I chased everyone away with my need to have things “just so”. So what if only the first 4 ft of the tree is decorated! You did it together! Don’t miss out on the time you have together by trying to make everything perfect. Hang loose girlfriend!

Let talk food! Did you know that you don’t have to drag the china and spend $150 on Christmas dinner in order to celebrate Christmas? Did you know that your family would be just as happy with a bowl of cereal for Christmas dinner? I know! I did it! Two years ago I had surgery during the holidays and my health was poor. (due to all the unnecessary stress I’m sure!) We had cereal and played board games for Christmas! I have to say it was that most stress free holiday I can remember… ever! There is nothing wrong with cooking dinner with all the trimmings but if it is not in the budget or you are going to stress out… it isn’t worth it! So what if your pie was burnt to a crisp, it is not worth the anxiety. (we don’t need the calories anyway! Ha!) Why would you fall into sin in order to celebrate the Savior? (or impress your mother in law?) Again… not worth it!

Gifts! Oh as if I haven’t confessed enough…Don’t make a mistake by over buying and losing sight of what is really important. I have to admit I love to give gifts!! I love to make people feel special and wanted. I love to make personal gifts and will stay up all night long, every night for a month making a gift if I knew it would make my loved ones feel special. I would also be crabby because of lack of sleep; I would be rushed and disorganized because I have focused so much on my giving that neglected the one I’m giving to. This will leave you overburdened and completely stress not to mention possible marriage problems all because we want to impress.

Are you getting the theme here? I was a holiday control freak!

I am going to share with you some things that I have learned through the years to help avoid being a GRINCH!

1. Be sure that no matter what your plans are for the holidays, don’t neglect the Lord! He is the reason we celebrate. What are you giving Jesus for Christmas? Be sure you give him your heart, your time and plans! Be faithful! Your plans are not more important than reading the Bible, praying, witnessing, and going to church.
2. Plan ahead but be flexible!! Be prepared for things to go wrong!! You CAN’T have everything your way! Maybe you’re late because God spared you from a horrible accident and let your 5 yr old put the star on and then… step away from the tree! The bible says Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with ALL thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In ALL thy ways acknowledge him and HE shall direct thy paths! Trust Him!
3. Delegate!! If you have a lot to do, ask for help. Let someone else do it! (And then don’t micro manage them so that it is perfect) Instead, enjoy the time spent together. Whether it be duties at church or at home, don’t try to tackle everything in order to prove that you’re super woman. If you insist.. You will be a super crabby woman!!
4. Don’t try to keep up the Jones’s. You don’t have to have________to be happy or to make memories. Try making homemade decorations or reuse the old ones. DON’T spend money you don’t have, to buy things you don’t need to make a impression on people who would be just as happy if you just gave them your time and a happy spirit!  
5. Be where you are!! Enjoy the time you have! Let people be who they are and treasure these memories! They will fade so quickly! They will fade and what is left is … What people remember about you.

Christmas is a special time to spend with loved ones and make memories that we will cherish for a lifetime. Let’s not be a Grinch!

Love you ladies!

Merry Christmas!!