For the Most Part / Mrs Mindy Holeman

Mrs Mindy Holeman

Pastor's Wife

Grandview Baptist - Woodburn

Woodburn, OR

I trusted Christ 19 years ago and every day since then I have "for the most part" trusted God with my life. I say "for the most part" because I believe there were times when I could not see God's hand in my circumstances. I didn't question whether God was there but rather if he was doing what was best for me or my family. I wondered if my prayers were being heard or if they were hindered by some unknown sin of mine. Regardless, I didn't have total faith. I didn't have that childlike faith I was supposed to have. The faith that I teach my girls to have every day. Trust God! He knows what He's doing! Why then do I wonder? Why would I try to take circumstances into my own hands when the way gets dark and I can't see the outcome.

 What is true faith and why do I fail Him when it counts the most? He has never let me down and yet I fall on my knees and beg for him to work things out "according to MY will". I say in my prayer, "Let thy will be done", but in my heart I am saying, I have a will. I have expectations! I want you to answer THIS prayer, THIS way. He may even let me have my way for a little while. He may allow me to twist and bend circumstances to meet my own expectations. He may slam the door on those plans that I have so diligently worked out. We are human so we bang on that door and beg God to open it again. All the while, God is watching us struggle with our faith. He is hearing us beg for our way but longs for us to trust his plan. Sometimes I feel like a 3 year old with the tantrums I give to God. Have you ever taken something from your child because it wasn't best for them? Did they throw a fit? I imagine that's what it looks like from Heaven when I don't get my way.  

The Bible says in Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with ALL thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In ALL thy ways acknowledge Him, and He SHALL direct thy paths. 

If you read this again you would see that 42 times I have used the words I, me, my, or mine. As Christians we are to have faith. This faith is in God, NOT in ourselves or in the circumstances we have bent and molded to satisfy our plans. Faith in God is trusting that He sees the bigger picture. Faith is acknowledging Him. Faith is knowing that when our hopes, our dreams and our plans fail... That the God of Heaven loves you and He alone knows what's best. We don't have to understand...

We just have to trust.