Sunday, July 12, 2015

Don't I Have Any Rights Around Here? / Mrs Eileen Abberger

 
Mrs Eileen Abberger
Pastor's Wife
Lakeview Baptist Church
Lakeview, MI
 
 
 
 
Don't I Have Any Rights Around Here?

I like pretty things. I surround myself with as much prettiness (is that a word?) as I can! 

My husband has given me great liberty to decorate and paint my home any way I choose!  I'm grateful and I try hard not to "girlie" it up too much!!!

The ladies at our church gave me a BEAUTIFUL geranium arrangement. It is artificial but it looks REAL; really real!  I had it proudly displayed on my dining room table.

My husband works from home from time to time. He chooses to sit at the dining room table!  As he would "bump" my flower arrangement, it would tip over onto whatever he was working. After a while he said, "Can you move this somewhere else?" I would respond, "It looks so pretty on that table, and besides our ladies bought this for me!"  This scenario went on (sad to say) for a few weeks. Finally, he became exasperated and said, "Can't you find somewhere else for this?  Don't I have any rights around here?"  I seized the moment!  I answered, "Yes, you have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be used against you!!!"  We both laughed, and I moved the flowers to another table.

Romans 12:10 says, "Be kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly kindness:  in honor preferring one another."

Life offers us endless opportunities to become divided. We are different. He is very practical and logical. I am very emotional; oh, did I say emotional! Yup!  But God intended that our differences bring peace and order to our relationship. The way in which we accomplish this goal is through honoring and preferring one another. To honour my husband means to respect him, to place great value on him. It means to highly esteem him. We will always be different, but we must learn to be considerate of our differences. God made us to compliment each other's differences, not hurt each other.

Understanding each other is one of the keys to a good marriage. Good understanding requires listening and transparency.  

James 3:18 says, "And the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace of them that make peace."

Proverbs 18:21 says, "Death and life are in the power of the tongue:  and they that love it shall eat the fruit thereof."

How can I honor my husband?  How can I show him the value which I find in him?  How can I prefer him?  I will esteem him as I guide my thoughts and my words in a path that is guided by wisdom and unselfishness:  James 3:17 tells us that the wisdom that comes from God is:

1) Pure - clean and transparent
2) Peaceable - harmonious, absent of strife and defensiveness
3) Gentle - the ability to recognize when our mate is weak or frustrated
4) Full of Mercy - ready to forgive; without grudge holding
5) Good Fruit - Healing and for the benefit of others
6) Without Partiality- Arousing uncertainty (moving the flower arrangement before he's frustrated)
7) Without Hypocrisy - having a different measuring stick for yourself than you do for your husband.


Good marriages are not an accident. If we want a good marriage, we must intentionally work on it every day.  I love my husband. He is the greatest gift I've been given apart from my salvation.  It will only continue to be that way to the degree I esteem, honour and love him!  Let's get busy preferring one another!

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